Monthly Archives: August 2013

Letter to my friend Ego

Dear Ego

It has come to my attention that you have again been trying to make me feel better without success, and with that I felt compelled to write you this letter (with love of course) and tell you why you have been unsuccessful.

Again you have managed to hamper flow by thinking your way is much better and ignored the promptings of our invisible friends. Due to your single-mindedness the outcome has not been as you expected – again. I know you want me to have the best life experiences and I do love you for your kind intentions, but the reality is your misguided help makes things worse for me by tenfold. Yes, I know you want me to feel good, to be, to do, and to have but you are getting in the way of creating the kind of life I imagine to be possible. I also know you’ll do just about anything to make that happen for me, but please, can you stop working against me. It’s okay for me not to have all that material ‘stuff’. I mean, where would I put it all for starters?

Let me run an objective definition of Ego from the dictionary, by you:

egos, plural

noun /ˈēgō/

A person’s sense of self-esteem or self-importance

  • – a boost to my ego

The part of the mind that mediates between the conscious and the unconscious and is responsible for reality testing and a sense of personal identity

An overly high opinion of oneself

  • – some major players with really big egos

(in metaphysics) A conscious thinking subject

Carl Gustav Jung identified your namesake, the Ego, as relating to the conscious mind. However he also mentioned the personal unconscious (what is not present such as memories) and the collective unconscious (our psychic inheritance – all the other stuff). Working with the last two is what would make life a somewhat for us both.

Moving on now to the shadow side of us which some might call the dark side of your namesake, the Ego, however the shadow is neither good nor bad, it is what it is and does what it does. It’ll work much better if we bring out the light shadow and embrace and accepting the dark (just thoughts dear Ego, just thoughts).

Please pay attention to this, Sigmund Freud said that the Ego says “take care of a need as soon as an appropriate object is found.” And so the Ego struggles to provide for us until obstacles start getting in the way of life. This is the part where it should start making sense to you and what I’ve been trying to tell you.

I met with you (again) recently and travelled with my Pathfinder to the deepest parts of my Soul. While I was there I took the opportunity to see you as you truly are.

What I found was a well-intentioned, if not misguided aspect of my Self, fully loaded with a mish-mash of experiences ranging from having a safe, secure life to suddenly having it taken away at a moment’s notice (what was with that sand storm that destroyed everything?); to the fall of great wealth to extreme poverty (THAT dungeon experience still haunts me). These experiences and more have accumulated since time began and include this present lifetime, and I’m under no illusion that they will continue in various forms until the end of my soul journey in human form.

So, having observed all our experiences I can say I have a fairly good understanding your modus operandi – you want to fill a need for me… Lovely, however your best intentions to create the situations you create are not much chop, instead they’re working against us, and I find them boring, frustrating, and exhausting. Please try to resist the urge to use subtle stand over tactics, by your friend Self Sabotage, to get your own way. Yes, I am onto you. I acknowledge that you are indeed a powerful aspect of my Self, so imagine using that power for our highest good, living the best life imagined, not to the detriment of how our life tends to pan out when you get going with your “I want, want, want…get, get, get…”

We’re bound together through time and space in human form so come on, lighten up, let’s collaborate positively and work together nicely so we can benefit from all this lifetime has to offer. Let’s negotiate how to work together with our highest guidance and all which resides in our unconscious mind and beyond (you do realise we have ‘our guys; our team’ helping us from the other side?). Our lifetimes together shouldn’t be good versus evil, dark versus light, angel versus demon, and conscious versus unconscious. Instead, if I may suggest, we begin to work as an integrated team for we are bound together like yin and yang. So how about it dear Ego, let’s make this lifetime work for both of us, let’s work to what our Highest Self knows is the best path and allow all the other good ‘stuff’ to be a lovely added bonus.

Yes, I know you believe you know what’s best for me because I’ve been there for every one of your end results – maybe you are forgetting that I’m conscious not dead, and I can hear your mind monkey chatter loud and clear.

If I didn’t write you this letter dear Ego, the pattern of your behaviour would continue, then where do you think would we be? No clue? Well I’ll tell you where, back to first base, that’s where. If you think this behaviour is acceptable, continue what you do but I’m self-aware now which translates to I’m back in the driver’s seat. Notice I said ‘I’m self-aware now’. I want to highlight this to you because you think you are already self-aware, and to get your own way without me knowing (well, you thinking I don’t know but I do…) you employ the services of your friend Self Sabotage, clearly a strategic alliance on your part to ensure you have control.

I love you Ego, you are part of me and I am part of you and because you have my best interests to show your love for me, you work at getting me material ‘stuff’. Please resist helping me so much, I can honestly do without a lot of the material ‘stuff’ you want me to have, plus I love my divine connection too much to ignore their messages. I’m not suggesting we can’t achieve wonderful things by working closely together with our highest guidance, but how about we just allow life to unfold in the best way possible and if this means not to have the big ‘stuff’ (whatever that is) then how peaceful would that be?

That is all….

Forever yours,

Michaela 🙂

Life can give horses lemons too…A horsey tale by Pet Whisperer Davina O’Brien

My name is Davina O’Brien-Herbert and I am a Pet Whisperer.  My clientele are usually dogs, cats and horses.  Naturally they bring their human companions along for any workshops or lessons.  Being able to communicate with animals helps me to have insight into what is going on in their lives.

We have a horse at home called Monsieur Megalodon (a.k.a. Msr).  He came into my life a few years ago when I met my Husband.  Msr had been in a few different homes before becoming a member of our family.  The prior experiences Msr had had with humans were definitely of the lemony variety.  How do I know this?  Well, his brain was frazzled when I first met him and he was always on guard and lived with adrenaline constantly pumping through his body.  At the end of the day he felt that he only had himself on whom he could depend and trust. There was no way he could stand beside you calmly and eat grass.  Msr was too stressed and nervous to allow him this enjoyment.  With the other horses, we were able to stand near them whilst they snacked on grass – a great bonding time for anyone with horses and invaluable for your relationship.  However this was not possible for Msr, as far as he was concerned, humans were strange and untrustworthy creatures.

Head Teacher, Monsieur Megalodon a.k.a. Msr in Davina's paddock

Head Teacher, Monsieur Megalodon a.k.a. Msr in Davina’s paddock

Msr had two stable accidents fairly close together.  In the latter he damaged his face very close to his eye.  I was the one who found him in the morning.  This completely changed our relationship.  I began to make more time for him and to look at his talents and abilities with an ‘open’ eye.  Both my husband and I began to speak to him about his potential.  We could see him as a Teacher / Healer though to step into this he would have to make a lot of changes in his life, such as starting to trust humans.  Msr took our words to heart and thought about what we said.  It was not long after our discussions that you could see him start to make the necessary changes which would enable him to teach humans.

Msr is now the Head Teacher we use in our Horse handling, Horse communication and Horse riding lessons.  Horses are very sensitive beings and Msr is especially sensitive.  This means that he is not necessarily the best fit for every student that we have. He needs a human that is sensitive and can feel what is going on for him as well as ‘hold’ his hand – metaphorically speaking – if and when necessary.   Every time I interact with him he teaches me more about horses and about life in general.  Amazingly you can learn a lot of life skills from the horses.  Msr excels in teaching life skills and is patient and empathic due to the ‘dark’ spots that he has had in his own life.

Now these changes for Msr did not happen overnight.  Everything happened over a period of time.  We did everything at a pace and time that worked for Msr, anything else would have been counterproductive, and would most likely have reversed his progress.  To see him these days happily grazing with a student at the end of a lesson is inspiring.  At one time he could not have done this even with people that he knew well.  He is constantly changing and developing.

Instead of being a hindrance, his lemony start has been his motivator.  It is not only humans that get handed lemons in life.  Our animal friends often encounter lemony issues as well.   With help and support, lemonade can be made from the lemons. Though of course Msr would prefer the lemons turn into carrots.  Yummy!


Davina O’Brien Herbert is a Pet Whisperer who helps people have a better relationship with their pets – the majority being dogs, cats and horses. Davina also conducts private sessions with pet and human, teaches horse riding, horse handling, and Ladies Confidence Building Workshops. For more information contact Davina on 0438 598 995 or email

Writer’s Block? Try Quis, Quid, Quando, Ubi, Cur…

A long, long time ago there lived a gentleman called Hermagoras of Temnos (323-390 BCE), who was a Greek rhetorician who taught, not surprisingly, rhetoric in Rome. He came up with a brilliant idea (well he had many but this one is truly brilliant and worthy of mention). He came up with the idea to divide writing topics into seven circumstances to give more structure to things. The seven consisted of who, what, when, where, why, in what way, by what means or quis, quid, quando, ubi, cur, quem ad modum, quibus adminiculis which I think has a rather lovely, exotic ring to it.

His idea took off and over another long period of time (with a few inclusions by other famous people) the Five Ws that we know came about.

So when life gives you lemons with a writer’s block, turn them into lemon pie in the form of the following well known formula used by journalists, educators and teachers, investigators, and just about anyone who writes:

  • Who (is it about)
  • What (happened)
  • When (did it take place)
  • Where (where did it take place)
  • Why (did it happen)

Add to the mix that wonderful Rudyard Kipling poem (a favourite of mine) he wrote to accompany the story of The Elephant’s Child in Just So Stories 1902, and writer’s block begone!

I keep six honest serving-men;

(They taught me all I knew)

Their names are What and Why and When

And How and Where and Who

 Have fun writing 🙂